I have to apologize in advance for some potentially insensitive things I’m gonna say about dead people, but this stuff has me bouncing between rage and apathy like a goddamn ping pong ball. So let’s get to it!
The potato-faced über-Karen known as Marjorie Taylor Greene has been shitting her ignorance all over social media for the last few years, and her latest desperate plea for attention is just as pathetic as you’d expect.
In a Sunday night tweet, the conspiracy enthusiast and super-spreader of Covid misinformation shared a screenshot of Atlanta restaurant Argosy’s Instagram post with an image of their door sign that read: “For the safety of our staff, guests, and community… NO VAX NO SERVICE.” Which inspired Greene to yet again wave her racist flag via an ignorant, offensive tweet. “This is called segregation,” she said above the image.
Now, this is truly special. These people are claiming that wearing a mask goes against their religious beliefs. Because of course it does, in the dumpster-fire we all now live in.
Neil says in years past, the school made exceptions for students who wore certain attire in line with their religious beliefs. He says this should be no different. He and his wife feel their children should not have to wear something they believe would restrict them in any way. “Our God is not Fauci, it’s Jesus and we should have the rights to be defended and supported in the same way,” Neil said.
…“I would like to make medical decisions for my children and religious decisions for our family. My husband and I like to make those together, without influence from the government or the school board. Our beliefs are that our freedoms come from God, not from man, not from governing bodies,” Melissa said.
You know what, Melissa? Shut your God-bothering food hole for just a sec. Who says anyone should worship Fauci? The man is trying his damnedest to help this country the best he can with his 40 YEARS OF VIRUS RESEARCH AND EXPERTISE, and because we’re trusting his expertise which is proving to save lives, you claim to know better? What exactly are your credentials? Fuck you, Melissa, and fuck your ignorant husband too. A mask isn’t limiting your “freedoms” one goddamn bit and you know it. Try thinking about the lives of others for a change, how about that? Or would that be too Jesus-like for you? Selfish pricks.
Well how about that? Another hate-spreading enemy of humanity in general has the virus. Yippee!
As Denver’s Westword noted: “He would gleefully read obituaries of AIDS sufferers while cranking ‘Another One Bites the Dust’ by Queen, whose lead singer, Freddie Mercury, succumbed to the malady.”
Enyart, who is also pastor of Denver Bible Church, opposed mask mandates and called those who impose them “mask nazis” and “mask-mandating control-freak bureaucrats.” He won a lawsuit last autumn against mask mandates and crowd restrictions.
This story is one of many that are beginning to communicate to the rest of the country that our hospitals are filling up with people who refused to get vaccinated…and those with treatable conditions are left to wait, or even die. I’m beginning to think that hospitals should start turning away patients with COVID if they’re not vaccinated. They’ve made the decision to dance with death, and they’re dragging more responsible people down with them.
When U.S. Army veteran Daniel Wilkinson started feeling sick last week, he went to the hospital in Bellville, Texas, outside Houston. His health problem wasn’t related to COVID-19, but Wilkinson needed advanced care, and with the coronavirus filling up intensive care beds, he couldn’t get it in time to save his life.
And here we have another poor shmuck who decided to trust conspiracies more than science and ingest cow dewormer. I just can’t feel too much sympathy for people like this.
After the announcement of his death, Facebook posts made by Manning circulated on social media. In one post, Manning shared an image that said, “I am not vaccinated by choice and that’s my right.”
Yes, it was definitely your right to trust social media “experts” and ignore the real ones. Buh-bye.
You know, I probably shouldn’t say this, but…this virus might actually be doing us a favor, the way it’s taking out all these dangerously toxic right-wing radio guys. Dare we hope that Alex Jones follows suit?
A conservative radio host in Florida who was openly opposed to the coronavirus vaccine has died of the COVID-19 infection after a three-week battle with the disease. Marc Bernier’s final tweet, sent July 30, compared the vaccination and virus mitigation efforts to Nazi Germany.
Yep, Nazi Germany. Sure. Whatever. Buh-bye.
This last guy was a real piece of work. More accurately, he was a real piece of shit. Get a load of this:
In May, Apley posted an invitation for a “mask burning” being held at a bar in Cincinnati, commenting, “I wish I lived in the area!” A couple of weeks earlier, he posted a news article about giveaways and incentives meant to encourage people to get vaccinated, writing, “Disgusting.” Apley also railed against so-called vaccine passports, which restrict high-risk activities, such as indoor dining, to the fully vaccinated.
Recently, he suggested that mask mandates in Germany were akin to Nazism. And when former Baltimore health commissioner Leana Wen celebrated good news this spring about the Pfizer vaccine’s efficacy, a seemingly outraged Apley called her “an absolute enemy of a free people.”
On July 30, less than a week before his death, Apley reposted a meme on his Facebook page that said: “In 6 months, we’ve gone from the vax ending the pandemic—to you can still get covid even if vaxxed—to you can pass covid onto others even if vaxxed—to you can still die of covid even if vaxxed—to the unvaxxed are killing the vaxxed.”
Don’t you love how these guys always compare mask mandates to Nazi Germany, and yet they all voted for a guy in 2016 and 2020 who would turn America into a dictatorship if he could get away with it?
Anyway, good riddance. Just another big-mouthed asshole, full of online bravado and willing to take as many people down with him as possible. Next!
For decades the Texas GOP has managed to maintain Texas’ status as the socio-political bunghole of America. They’ve outdone themselves this time, however. Not only have they outlawed abortion at 6 weeks (when most women wouldn’t even know they’re pregnant yet), they’ve turned everyday citizens into anti-choice vigilantes who can spy and snitch on anyone who might be aiding a woman attempting to practice her Constitutional right to choose. Oh, and you can earn $10,000 for anyone whose life you’re able to ruin with said snitching. It’s a play right out of the German Stasi playbook, which shouldn’t surprise anyone, given the way conservatives have been getting cozy with neo-Nazis lately.
Hurricane Ida is shaping up to be one of the deadliest hurricanes we’ve had in decades. Sooooo…are all the anti-maskers and vaccine haters gonna be throwing themselves headfirst into it? It would certainly be consistent with their behavior towards other deadly situations…
(“Sexy Ida” is an old Ike & Tina Turner song, for you young ‘uns)
Every day for the last couple of months we’ve been seeing more and more stories about proud, patriotic, mask-hating idiots following the herd over the COVID cliff. This, folks, is why it’s a death cult. It’s as if they’re wanting to get sick, hoping to die…and for what? Some kind of fucked-up martyrdom? A last middle-finger to reason and common sense (and the evil commie libs)? Or is it just a stubborn unwillingness to admit they’re wrong when the corpses begin to pile up around them? We’ll probably never know.
What we do know is that these people are taking up valuable space in hospitals, and those needing immediate attention for injuries or other non-COVID ailments aren’t able to get treatment. Some are dying as a result. That’s why I have zero sympathy for the willfully ignorant who put themselves and everyone around them at risk.
This guy was clutching a photo of Trump on his deathbed. Sooooo…the cognitive test wasn’t going so well, then?
“Every day in ICU, they give me a cognitive test asking me various questions as to date, where am I, etc,” Stutts posted on August 4, along with a picture of himself and Trump. “They always ask who the President is and I keep telling them the President is STILL Donald J. Trump! Not going to let them fool me with that poser named Joe. Nosirree!”
This guy’s wife died from the virus, and he’s probably the one who brought it home to her. He’s anti-mask, anti-vaccine, and I 100% guarantee he’s also pro-Trump and considers himself a righteous Christian. Not a very pro-life stance, is it?
A Republican legislator in Maine who lost his wife to COVID-19 last week appeared at a rally on Tuesday that featured a GOP colleague who compared the state’s Democratic governor to a Nazi doctor who performed deadly experiments on Jews during the Holocaust.
Here’s another one who thought he could beat the virus with “natural” means, including livestock medication. He distrusts actual scientists who developed a vaccine that’s been proven to keep people alive, but noooo… he’d rather put his trust in bullshit pseudoscience (as recommended by Fox News and InfoWars). He had 3 kids and a wife who’s expecting another one. And now he’s fucking dead.
Jessica Wallace told the newspaper that her husband initially refused to be tested and took unproven home remedies for the virus, including high doses of Vitamin C, zinc, aspirin, and ivermectin — a deworming treatment commonly given to livestock. Poison control centers are being swamped with calls from people suffering ill effects from ivermectin, and the Food and Drug Administration has issued alerts against ingesting the drug.
His wife also said something interesting in this story:
She emphasized that “whether he was a hardcore conservative or not, he was an amazing man.”
Doesn’t sound that amazing to me. Precisely because he was a hardcore conservative, he stepped right in front of the COVID train and practically dragged his whole family along with him. It’s a miracle his wife or kids haven’t died from it (yet). Sounds like the actions of a selfish asshole, but that’s just me.
Ah yes, it’s becoming an all-too-familiar story: Christian radio guy spews conspiracies and other nonsense, Chriustian radio guy catches the virus, Christian radio guy keels over and dies to the surprise of no one.
In February, DeYoung published an interview promoting the conspiracy theories that the Pfizer vaccine would make women sterile and that world governments were using the virus and vaccine to centralize power. DeYoung’s guest at the time, Sam Rohrer, said that very few people who were infected lost their lives, calling the vaccine only a “purported solution” and “not truly a vaccine.” Both host and guest encouraged listeners to read conspiracy-minded materials on the coronavirus vaccine, with DeYoung asking, “Could this vaccine be another form of government control of the people?”
On his Facebook page someone actually calls him “a Child of the Most High God, a great man of great intellect, a great historian of Bible history, an expert on the Middle East, an expert on Bible Prophecy, a hilariously funny man if you knew him, and a very kind and loving person who faithfully shared the Gospel.” I’d rather call him a selfish prick who endangered his listeners by spreading lies and willful ignorance in the guise of Christian teachings. But again, that’s just me.
This one is truly special because it has a sci-fi angle!
Burke lamented the fact that shaking hands was being done less frequently to stop the spread of covid-19, and made perhaps his most strange claim when he said people would try to implant a microchip during vaccination against coronavirus, during the Rome Life Forum in May of 2020. “There is a certain movement to insist that now everyone must be vaccinated against the coronavirus covid-19 and even that a kind of microchip needs to be placed under the skin of every person so that at any moment he or she can be controlled regarding health and regarding other matters, which we can only imagine as a possible object of control by the state,” Burke said.
And of course there is a “certain movement” to ensure everyone gets the vaccine…because until that happens, we’re gonna keep having these lockdowns and mask requirements that y’all hate so much. Fucking moron. I’ve read some more about this Cardinal and he sounds like a genuine Trumpian whackjob.
For anyone who wasn’t a terrible human being, Trump’s term was a daily struggle to get through. Every day we woke up wondering what the hell he’d said or done this time to further humiliate America in front of the rest of the world.
One day in 2019 while walking my dog, he stopped and squatted to push out one of his typically massive shits. I thought to myself, “Oh great, here comes another Trump tweet.” And an idea was born! So I picked out some of his dumbest tweets and photos from before and during his term, and with some printed labels and toothpicks I began a little art project called Trump Dumps. What better way to symbolize the substance and value of a Trump opinion than a fresh dog turd?
I created an account called @trump_dumps2020 on Instagram and started posting one every week or so. One of them even has a fly that had landed on the tweet — how perfect is that?? I put some snarky hashtags on each one, some of them intended to lure in unsuspecting MAGAts just for fun: #shits #poop #treason #yescollusion #ImpeachalypseNow #trump2020 #RussianAsset #kompromat #usefulidiot #quidproquo #bribery #peetape #itmfa #MAGA #covfefe #TrumPutin #YoureThePuppet
This didn’t go on too long. I posted them for a few months before getting tired of looking at his dumb words and trying to get decent lighting and angles for piles of toxic poop. But it was weirdly therapeutic (and satisfyingly juvenile), so I suppose it served its purpose.
Here is the full Trump Dumps collection, including a few which I never got around to posting. I included the Instagram captions as well. Enjoy!
I tend to make sweeping generalizations in my posts, usually for simplicity (but sometimes just for spite). However, in this case I’m going to declare it 100% justified when I say that Trump has played the biggest part in the three scariest threats (in my opinion) we face in this raging American dumpster fire: distrust in democracy, an out-of-control virus, and sharply-divided citizens.
Isn’t this just ridiculous Trump-bashing hyperbole? Isn’t this stretching things just a little? Nope. Not one goddamn bit. In fact, if you’ve been paying close attention these past few years, most of the worst things happening in America at this moment can be directly traced to Trump and his steaming turd of a legacy. Let’s take a look!
Again and again he has proven himself to be pathologically dishonest, craven, selfish, power-mad, self-absorbed, misogynistic, thin-skinned, racist, self-aggrandizing, greedy, abusive, manipulative, attention-seeking, petty, simple-minded, and many other terms we attribute to the absolute worst aspects of humanity. That’s just a scientific fact. What should scare everyone shitless is that he has convinced his followers that it’s acceptable to be exactly the same way. He’s given his GOP toadies and other conservative pigfuckers permission to be a complete and utter shitbags, just like he is. And boy, have they taken up the “I’m A Massive Asshole” flag and run with it! The lawbreaking and ethics-stomping done by his administration is widely-documented and legendary for its disdain for the rule of law.
Where has this gotten us? Well, our democracy is a hair away from total collapse, hundreds of thousands have died needlessly, and our society is polarized in ways we never could have imagined before. Trump has done his very best to turn us into a banana republic…and like everything else he’s touched, even that was a failure in the end (though just barely).
It’s actually kind of impressive in a fucked-up sort of way. I mean, when he was “elected” I knew things were going to get bad, but I thought his fellow Republicunts would keep him in line. You know…follow the law and all that. Boy, was I wrong about that! I should have known better. If there’s one thing Republicans do better than Democrats, it’s sticking together as a united front no matter how dangerous their policies are. Democrats would rather fight amongst themselves instead of getting anything done (I’m looking at you, Sen. Joe “Roadblock To Progress” Manchin.) But I digress…
There are many, many factors I’m basing my Blame Trump theory on, but here are some of the highlights:
First, the obvious one: mobs of drooling MAGAts stormed the Capitol and actually tried to overthrow our government, some of whom were helped by GOP traitors
Lots of people are distrusting any news that doesn’t come from Russia-friendly propagandist outlets like Fox News and OAN
Republican officeholders all over the country are working hard to overturn fair elections in Trump’s favor with ZERO evidence
Gullible asshats have been getting suckered in by QAnon fantasies and conspiracies, to the point where they’re becoming dangerous. Did you read about the conspiracy nutjob who killed his children with a spear gun because he thought they were turning into lizard people?
Trump’s operatives have been installed at every level of government, many of them replacing lifelong exerts of sensitive and complex issues who were driven out
Spineless Republicans scrambled to defend Trump during his TWO impeachment hearings like baby swine fightin’ for a teat
Many conservative voters now believe that democracy itself doesn’t actually work, because of Trump’s evidence-free election lies
Trump’s cronies were subpoenaed many times for information about his various potential crimes and ethics breaches, and most of them just ignored it. Who ignores subpoenas?? Do our laws mean nothing?
MAGAts have a deep distrust of any well-educated expert (mostly scientists) who gives an opinion they don’t like
Thousands of people are dying daily because they think vaccinations are evil (and the coronavirus is just “the flu”)
Republicans are passing a massive number of bills to make it harder for certain groups of people (hint: they aren’t white) to vote
Churches are righteously declaring lockdowns to be “anti-Christian”, and defiantly holding services mask-free for the ones who are still alive
Actual adults are throwing tantrums in public places when they’re expected to wear a mask
GOP governors are refusing to order mask mandates when all their states’ hospitals are overflowing with dying children
We have to deal with potato-faced attention whore Marjorie Taylor Greene and her desperate, batshit-crazy antics
Matt Gaetz and his sex-trafficking — need I say more?
Megachurches holding mask-free superspreader events, essentially ensuring that lockdowns will continue (which they will continue to bitch about)
Groups of white-power terrorists roaming the streets with idiotic names like Proud Boys and Boogaloo Boys — essentially just a bunch of sloppily-dressed Nazi cosplayers with big guns and itty-bitty dicks
In a nutshell, Trump and his ass-licking wannabes in the GOP have succeeded in turning an entire segment of the American population into anti-America, anti-democracy troglodytes who shun science, common sense, and the very concept of facts. He’s basically created a cult of imbecilic twats. Hell, even a survivor of Jonestown says so.
Yes, some of this stuff was happening in various forms before Trump came along. For example, we’ve always had these militia crazies with rifles who fancy themselves as America’s last defense against tyranny (or whatever the fuck they’re afraid of). But Trump game along and publicly praised them. He called them good people and said he loves them. He refused to condemn any of their actions, even when their actions led to death and destruction. He gave them a sort of demented legitimacy…and that’s a perfect example of why I lay the blame for a lot of America’s problems squarely at his stupid orange feet.
I was so very much hoping Trump would wither away and slink back into the sewer that spawned him after he lost the election. Unfortunately he’s inspired many nutjob Republicans to take his corruption and Constitution-stomping to the next level, and now we have 2022 and 2024 to deal with. This shit is never gonna end.
This was supposed to be posted months ago but the dipshittery of the subject matter made it hard to finish. Better late than never?
I probably shouldn’t be so astounded that something like QAnon became such a massive “movement.” It’s a pro-Trump religious cult after all, and we’ve all seen how Trumpers don’t exactly question what they’re told to believe. Its followers believe everything Q says as if they personally know the people behind it aren’t lying to their stupid faces. So it’s basically a massive online Trump rally in that regard. (I was going to call it “political LARPing for retards” but decided against it.)
QAnon’s absurd theories have many levels, circles, and loops. Some of the most eyeroll-worthy claims:
Furniture company Wayfair has been using their products to transport children in a sex-trafficking ring. That’s why so many of their closets have girl’s names. SO OBVIOUS!
COVID-19 was engineered by Democrats/Bill Gates/George Soros/etc. to purposely hurt Trump’s presidency. OF COURSE!
A shadowy cabal of Democrat and Hollywood pedophiles secretly runs the government as the “deep state”. OH YES!
Hillary Clinton was running a sex-trafficking ring out of a Pizza parlor basement. (Technically this came shortly before QAnon, but many of his followers were early believers in “Pizzagate” and it was quickly absorbed into the Q canon, so it may as well have come from Q.)
Robert Mueller and Trump were secretly working together against the “deep state” pedos and Mueller’s investigation was all for show. EVERYONE KNOWS THAT!
Trump uses hand signals in his press briefings to make the shape of the letter Q, as a signal to QAnon followers. CAN’T YOU SEEEEE IT?
JFK Jr. faked his plane-crash death and is living secretly as a Trump warrior. NATURALLY!
Trump’s choice of necktie color sends out secret signals to QAnon followers. Example: a yellow tie during a COVID-19 press conference indicates “all clear” (the virus is fake). WATCH THE SIGNS!!1!1
So…yeah. They’re not exactly living in the same universe as the rest of us. They live in a world where pedophiles and sex traffickers lurk around every corner, and they don’t give a shit if their antics interfere with legitimate organizations who are actually battling this stuff. Their fixation on child sex is more than a little disturbing, if you ask me. They really seem obsessed with it.
Anyway, here are the most obvious signs that QAnon is a massive, bullshitty hoax, a collective delusion that’s going to fuck with our country for years.
It was spawned on 4chan. 4chan is no more, but if you even halfway pay attention to internet culture, you know that if something originated on 4chan you should take it with a square-mile-sized grain of salt. 4chan was a playground for racists, incels, rape apologists, Nazis, and all the other dregs of humanity you can think of. They turned trolling into a sport, doing their best to make peoples’ lives miserable just to amuse themselves. QAnon is just a long-haul trolling campaign that has gotten wildly out of control.
Trump is touted as a mighty warrior in the battle against evil. Are you fucking kidding me? You really think Trump is capable of doing anything that doesn’t personally benefit himself? Have you been paying any attention to his behavior at all? The man is an emotionally unstable, morally bankrupt, mentally declining sociopath who takes no action unless he gets something out of it. This is common knowledge, folks. Trump is incapable of being the savior of anyone but himself. Q’s followers say this is all an act to throw everyone off the scent of his secret heroic fight, which shows the rest of us that these fuckwits are able to rationalize literally anything to confirm their delusion.
The targets. Just who is behind this evil sex-trafficking of children, you may ask? According to QAnon, it’s Hollywood elites and powerful Democrats. Specifically, Hillary Clinton. Oh, and the Jews (naturally). This is basically Trump’s 2016 campaign turned on its ear and severely perverted for maximum pearl-clutching. This means all those morons who are still fixated on Hillary’s emails can say “See? SEE?? I knew she was up to something!!”
Declaring all media as part of the evil scheme…except Fox News and OAN. Because these two mouthpieces of the Trump admin, each with long histories of spewing provable lies, are the ones which have the real answers. They’re so totally unbiased! Riiiight.
Failed “insider” predictions. Time after time Q has predicted things that never came to pass. Stuff like: Trump was launching a coup against the “deep state” and would open thousands of sealed indictments. There would be widespread civil disorder as a result. Then he’d declare martial law and order the military to take over. Yeah, how’s that going? The most famous failed prediction is probably when he said Hillary was going to be arrested in 2017. Whoops. These all had specific dates attached to them, and none of them happened. That’s why his more recent predictions have become more and more vague, leaving them up for interpretation and letting deranged imaginations run wild. Q followers actually don’t care if the predictions have completely failed, because they’re already used to waiting for the often-predicted End Times that never seem to come. It’s like a cult within a cult.
Spoon-feeding “secret truths” to the gullible. This goes for all conspiracy theories: everyone wants to be in on a secret. Everyone wants to feel like they have answers, even if they don’t have any questions. It’s addictive, I know. The problem is that followers of Q aren’t willing to apply even a tiny grain of critical thought to what they’re reading and sharing. Instead they willingly guzzle it down, because it helps them feel less shitty about supporting an un-American, un-Christian, sexual predator piece of shit like Trump.
When asked for proof of anything, the typical QAnon zombie goes glassy-eyed and repeats the phrase “Do your research!” As if that means or settles anything at all. For them, “research” is sitting on the toilet and looking at a bunch of shitty Q-related videos and memes.
QAnon beefs up follower counts and sells tons of merchandise. Many “influencers” (god, I hate that word) on social media are injecting QAnon material into their regular content to pull in more followers and cash in on those sweet, sweet ad clicks. Even the yoga and spiritual communities are getting infested with it. It’s pretty gross. And there are tons of online shops hawking Q crap to those with money to flush down the toilet. Which is actually kind of funny in a “holy shit these people are dumb” kinda way.
There are probably more, but this is about as much as I can stand to write about it. The whole thing is laughable but also terrifying, because it signals a dangerous turn for this country and its psyche. It’s bad enough that so many people voted to keep Trump for a second term, but a large group of them are also these QAnon dipshits. And now we have Q supporters in Congress. Fuuuuuuck.
Don’t you just love generalizations? But in this case I think it’s justified. And just FYI I’ve been stewing about this for many months, so if I come across as angry or hateful, well…let’s just say Trump and his simpering fans bring out the worst in me. 😀
Over the past couple of years I’ve discovered that Trump is the perfect subject for gauging someone’s character. When I learn that someone supports Trump, it tells me everything I need to know about their politics and morals, and how deep (or shallow) their convictions are. It’s super convenient because for me there’s really no grey area. “Oh, you voted for him? And you still support him after all he’s done? OK, I see. No, you don’t have to justify your views to me. I already know everything about you.”
So how can this one fact about someone inform me of their entire character? Well, I tend to put them into certain groups, and each group has its own dumbass behavior that gives it away. Here are some of the most common ones. If you need examples of anything mentioned below, go do some Googling because there’s more than enough evidence out there. Or you could go read the comments on a Fox News story, but I really don’t recommend that. Your intelligence will be severely degraded for hours after.
Pro-death pro-lifers — Trumpers who call themselves “pro-life” don’t give a shit about babies after they’re born. (Actually, this is true of most anti-choice folks.) They don’t think women can be trusted do make their own decisions. They’re fine with breaking up families of brown people and throwing their kids into cages. They’re OK with letting hundreds of thousands of people die from COVID-19 because trusting science “infringes on their liberties.” Some Republican mayors and governors have even gone so far as to forbid any mandatory mask measures! Why? Because they think it’s God’s will that thousands of people die as the virus burns its way through our cities. The dead are basically sacrifices for the economy. Yeah, that’s suuuuuper pro-life of you.
Christian hypocrites — Trumpers who claim to be righteous, God-fearing Christians are actually the phoniest “Christians” — and some of the most morally bankrupt people — in America. They ignore his adultery, sexual harassment, pathological lying, racist shit-stirring, ethics violations, lawbreaking, and laughable pandering to them. They overlook these and many, many other things because they have a guy in power who’s trying to ban abortion (though he’s surely paid for many) and advance the nutty evangelical agenda. Because of this they’ve forfeited their right to criticize anyone else’s morals ever again, so they can shut the fuck up. An article in Washington Monthly puts it just right: “Trump takes kind old ladies who worry about the unborn and transforms them into hate-tweeters. He turns upright and model citizens into apologists for sexual assault, white nationalism, business fraud, self-dealing and foreign interference in our elections.”
Phony patriots — Many Trumpers love to squawk about the sacredness of our Constitution, even as he squats down and takes a gigantic shit all over the Constitution every single day he’s in office. They cheer his demonizing of the free press, they love his public personal attacks on anyone who calls him out on his bullshit, they’re fine with his hundreds of ethics violations and self-dealing, they had no problem with bribing Ukraine to help him win re-election, they’re silent about his using military force on peaceful protesters in D.C. so he could have a photo op…the list of his dictator-wannabe actions goes on and on. And they defend it 24/7 as if it’s totally normal.
These fuckers are un-American and have zero convictions, and the same goes for the cowardly elected GOP lawmakers who refuse to police his behavior. I watched hours and hours of craven, bile-spitting Republicans do and say literally anything to defend Trump’s corrupt and treasonous acts during his impeachment, all because they were either benefiting from it financially or they were afraid he might tweet something mean about them. Imagine if Obama did any of the things that Trump has gotten away with — he would have been lynched by conservatives and burned on the White House lawn within days.
Spineless rifle-strokers — Gun-toting Trumpers are some of the worst. These weirdos fetishize high-powered firearms in a way that’s truly disturbing, and they just love being seen in public waving their fully-loaded dick enlargers around. They screech endlessly about their right to own guns that nobody but the military should have, while thousands are killed each year by unhinged psychos spraying bullets into crowds and schools. Gun nuts don’t give a shit about dead kids — they just want to hold and caress that cold, heavy steel and fantasize about saving America from tyranny. Meanwhile, actual tyranny lands on our doorstep as Trump sends masked, armed goons in unmarked vans into Democrat-run cities to kidnap protesters off the streets. Where are you tough guys with your badass weapons now? This is your chance to fight back and be heroes at last! Aaaand they’re nowhere to be seen. Either they’re cowardly little posers like we always knew them to be, or they’re standing aside because Trump’s goons are mostly attacking lots and lots of black people. (Actually, they’re both.)
Anti-mask fuckwits — It would be a shame to ignore the coronavirus denialists, right? These troglodytes live in their own little world, where science is a lie and nothing in the news can be trusted unless it plops from the distended cornhole of Fox News, Breitbart, OAN, or any number of other batshit-crazy extremist conservative orifices.
To them, wearing a mask is “tyranny” and “conditioning.” Any measure taken to stop the spread of the virus is seen as an attack on America’s liberty, maybe even its very soul. They go to church, grocery stores, concerts, parties, and conventions while proudly proclaiming their independence of the evil influence of masks or social distancing. Many of them later become sick and die, and some publicly regret their actions and beg others not to be as mind-blowingly stupid and selfish as they were, but few of their fellow “patriots” ever listen. Oh well, maybe it’s just nature weeding out the dumber bits of our gene pool.
Conspiracy dipshits — What to say about these people? Well for starters, critical thinking isn’t part of their daily routine. They’re so desperate to make sense of the pandemic chaos, so determined to make their 2016 vote for Trump somehow not the biggest mistake of their lives, that they will believe anything they read on the internet that paints him in a good light. It doesn’t matter how outlandish or insane it is, they’ll greedily swallow it and then shit it out all over social media as “OMG The Actual TRUTH You Gotta SEE this OMG”. The Black Lives Matter movement is funded by wealthy Jews who want to control America? Sure. Obama is a secret Muslim who wants to ban Christianity? Of course! 5G wireless is the real cause of the pandemic? Yes! It’s all soooo obvious, you guys!!!1!
These nutjobs were bad enough before the election, but now we have this QAnon bullshit to wade through. It’s too moronic and convoluted to sum up easily because the rational brain wants to reject it outright, but in a nutshell QAnon (which Buzzfeed rightly calls a “collective delusion”) says Trump is single-handedly fighting the (nonexistent) Deep State in its efforts to take him down. They also think there’s a cabal of celebrities running a pedophile ring via a pizza parlor somewhere, and naturally Trump is fighting them too. But in secret! As if he has the brain capacity to even remember what he had for lunch yesterday. And they accept it without question, and it all comes from some anonymous douchebag who drops cryptic comments in a 4chan forum (which, ironically, has ties to child porn). The “movement” has gained international legs, which means America isn’t the only country plagued with a large number of internet lemmings.
Gay Republicans — And then we have a small but obnoxiously vocal number of Trumpers who fall outside of the “100% hetero with a clearly-defined gender” zone. These people are a shade browner than other MAGA turds because they’re voting for someone who actively oppresses them. Trump and his simpering enablers in D.C. (not to mention all those right-wing federal judges he’s installed) are doing everything they can to make sure gay folks can be discriminated against at every opportunity. A gay Trumper is a self-loathing twat who stubbornly clings to conservatism even when he realizes how damaging it is, and he causes severe harm to others when he somehow convinces them that conservatism is gay-friendly. I should know — I went through all that twattery in my early years, but luckily I snapped out of it and figured some things out.
The rest of the assholes
So…what about those who don’t fall into any of the above categories? Let’s say you’re not particularly religious, you’re ambivalent about the military, you don’t think about the abortion debate much, you have a vague knowledge of the Constitution but you leave the details to the scholars, etc. Well, all that doesn’t matter — supporting Trump still makes you a total shit of a person because by default you endorse all his other corruption, such as:
He’s distrustful of experts and hard science…not great for a pandemic
He used his “charitable foundation” to put money into his own pocket, for which he was fined $2 million to pay back 8 charities
He fawns over murderous dictators and tries to emulate their authoritarian actions
He gleefully courts racists and conspiracy nutjobs
He was fined $25 million for his scammy university which ripped off thousands of people
He pardons convicted criminals if they’re vocal supporters
He doesn’t read his daily security briefings, which is why he didn’t know about the Russian bounty thing (in fact he barely reads at all)
He told the public that injecting disinfectant might work against the coronavirus, and hundreds of idiots actually did it
He’s gone out of his way to fuck with the upcoming elections and accept help from any country willing to interfere
He’s using the presidency to funnel profits into his own businesses (emoluments what?)
He’s spent $137 million of your money on trips to his resorts for golf (per Trump Golf Count), plus he charges the Secret Service to stay there…at full price
He spouts complete nonsense about the coronavirus: it’ll just disappear, it’s only the flu, you can inject sunbeams to kill it, you can drink disinfectant to cure it, this or that drug totally treats it, masks are dumb, etc.
When someone shines a light on his wrongdoing, he fires them and replaces them with one of his ass-licking toadies
He’s using the DoJ to investigate and attack his enemies, and to hinder investigations into his own conduct and businesses
He tells dozens of lies a day, things that are easily fact-checked
He calls Mexicans rapists and killers, and wants them all deported, and yet he employs many illegal immigrants at his hotels and clubs (until the press made it public and he had to sack them)
He demonizes the free press, calling any unflattering news about him “fake news”, especially stuff that’s 100% accurate
He spends more time on Twitter than doing his actual job, sometimes posting 100+ tweets in a single day
He’s been getting rid of much-needed experts in many government agencies, replacing them with people with zero experience to basically neuter the agencies and let corruption thrive
He’s working hard to loosen regulations on corporations so they can pollute the country and fuck customers over more than ever
He made sure that millions of coronavirus stimulus money went to personal friends and businesses he has connections with
He does everything he can to stymie any sort of Congressional oversight of his doings
He crusades against mail-in voting with outright lies about “voter fraud” (WA is one of several states which has been doing it for years with no problems)
He forces his Secret Service to attend rallies during the pandemic, and many of them have gotten sick
And that’s just what I came up with off the top of my head. His evil fuckery is well-documented, and anyone who can look at it and still say he’s “a great guy who’s just trying to do what’s best for America” is, by association, a fuckery-enabling asshole with zero moral compass who enjoys watching the world burn.
Some might say this attitude is intolerant. “Typical libtard intolerance! Can’t handle different points of view.” Oh yeah…I’m intolerant as fuck. I’m intolerant of all the shit I listed above because rational, decent people don’t do those things, especially those in the highest office of the nation. I’m also pissed off for having to watch such morally-retarded people drag America further into the sewer.
“But I love Trump and I’m a good person!” you might say. “I donate thousands to charity! I rescue puppies! I volunteer daily at homeless shelters! I adopted 14 orphans! I saved a baby from a burning building! I fight to save the environment! I have three Purple Hearts! I invented Post-Its!” Well la-dee-fuckin-da. Who cares? You’re still shitty and God hates you. Keep rescuing those puppies, though. It’s not their fault America elected a goddamn adult baby.
Look… You’ve had almost 4 years to figure this guy out. If you’ve been paying attention to what he does, not just what he says, and you can honestly say you’re fine with it, that tells me all I need to know about what kind of person you are. If you’re on my social media and we’re not that close, I’ve already booted you. If you’re a friend, you surely know better than to bring this subject up to me. If you’re family and you still talk to me, I’ll still talk to you…but not about politics, never again. I’m done arguing and trying to reason with Trumpers and conservatives in general — I’ve done it for years and have nothing to show for it but damaged family relationships and countless hours wasted debating online. Nobody’s mind is ever changed, and I honestly have better things to do with my time. So I’m just going to try and survive this pandemic and focus on staying sane until that vile orange douchenozzle is no longer in office.
A friend of mine on Facebook recently lamented Trump’s childish hostility towards reporters who ask difficult questions (and many asking easy ones). I agree: Trump has been a massive dick to hardworking journalists who are giving us real news, not the half-assed tripe that spills from his drooling mouth.
Naturally, his Facebook post rubbed a MAGAt the wrong way. She spouted the usual right-wing excuses: the press is out to make Trump look bad, they’re trying to trip him up with “gotcha” questions, they ask him the same thing over and over, blah-blah-fucking-blah. It’s soooo tiresome and it shows a staggering willingness to gobble up whatever narrative their GOP overlords feed them. But what else is new in Trumpland, right?
I can’t stand to watch his “press briefings” on COVID-19. I just can’t ruin my day like that. But I’ve seen many clips of his outbursts, and what I see is reporters asking him direct, important questions that trigger him into a weird kind of attack mode. He interrupts, he stammers, he calls them names, insults them and their work…instead of just answering the questions. This is why reporters ask him the same question again and again: they never get a straight answer!
Someone from NBC News asked him, “What do you say to Americans, who are watching you right now, who are scared?” Instead of showing leadership and strength (as if!), he flipped his goddamn wig. “I say that you’re a terrible reporter! That’s what I say. I think it’s a very nasty question and I think it’s a very bad signal that you’re putting out to the American people.” So….was that question trying to trick him into taking “blame” for the virus? Or was it something every national leader gets asked in a time of crisis, when citizens need reassurance that their government is here to help? Gee, let me think…
Another reporter asked why America still lags behind countries like South Korea on testing per capita, and he snapped, “You should be saying congratulations instead of asking a really snarky question.” Congratulations? On what, the fact that our testing lags FAR behind these other countries? Oh that’s right, he takes responsibility for nothing. And rather than answer a difficult question, he stomps his little foot and pouts. Because he’s a fucking toddler.
The idea that those naughty reporters and the EEEvil Media are trying to make him look incompetent is a fairy tale cooked up by Fox News and OAN. He certainly doesn’t need them for that — he’s an old pro at it.
So Rush Limbaugh has lung cancer. Well, isn’t that interesting. Here’s my little personal history with this guy.
In the early 90’s, when I left home and moved to Phoenix to do the college thing, I discovered Rush on the radio. To my small-town mind, which hadn’t been exposed to a lot of politics (and before then I didn’t really care about it), he seemed to make a lot of sense. I loved his parody songs, some of which were wickedly clever, and his over-simplified way of pitting Us. vs. Them felt right. Liberals were the ones destroying America, they were the danger to be conquered at any cost! And I believed him. I really didn’t know any better. Yes, I knew I was gay, but I hadn’t come out to anyone officially and I didn’t really feel the need to. So I went along with it, thinking I was a conservative and hyping Rush to everyone I knew. My mom was delighted when I told her about him, and she became a massive fan and longtime listener (much to my shame years later). I laughed when he called women “feminazis.” I chortled when he basically called Chelsea Clinton an ugly dog. I cheered him on while he ranted scandalously for countless hours about Whitewater and Vince Foster’s suicide and Bill Clinton’s alleged affairs. America, fuck yeah!!
But the longer I lived in Phoenix, and the more I began looking around and exposing myself to different ways of seeing the world, the less certain I was about calling myself a conservative. Rush began to sound a little…crazy. His conspiratorial spiels got stale, and I began to realize that it’s all just fluff that preys on peoples’ insecurities. White peoples’ insecurities, to be more specific. So I just tuned him out, feeling I’d outgrown him. A few years later, in late 1999 (literally the last day), I moved to Seattle to start a new life. I was exposed to more culture and political views, came out to everyone officially, and further cemented my position as an outspoken Liberal. You know, the ones who are supposed to destroy America and all that? Uh-huh. I felt like I’d finally reached the Age of Reason.
During visits to my little hometown, though, my mom still had him on the radio all the time, which was upsetting. She was still hooked, and by this time Fox News has started to become part of her daily news intake as well, which didn’t help things at all. Fox News became ten times worse than Limbaugh, delivering carefully-crafted fear and paranoia targeted directly at her demographic: the aging boomer. It was a double whammy that changed our relationship forever, leading to many political arguments about stupid shit that I knew she was far too smart to believe, yet they convinced her anyway. To her credit, though, my mom was 100% accepting of me as her gay son and always supported marriage equality. She immediately accepted my partner (later husband) without blinking an eye, which I’ll always be grateful for.
My mom died suddenly a couple of months ago. We stopped arguing about politics about a year before Trump was elected (she said he scared her, interestingly), but I’ve always regretted introducing her to Rush Limbaugh — chances are she would have found out about him somehow anyway, but I’ll never forgive myself for contributing to the poisoning of her mind and worldview that way.
OK, back to Rush. Now, I’d never wish cancer on anyone. What a horrible way to go. Cancer killed my dad a couple of years ago, and it has claimed several other family members and friends over the years. But when I found out that Limbaugh already has advanced lung cancer…I smiled. The phrase “Reap what you sow” came to mind. For one thing, he’s smoked cigars for ages, because he doesn’t think it’s necessarily bad for you. But more importantly for me, this man has spewed bigotry and lies for decades, to millions of listeners to gladly eat it up without question. He’s contributed to the culture of assholery that has become part of the conservative norm: publicly troll and ridicule the innocent and weak, champion authoritarian ideas, cheer for the corrupt billionaire class, tear down those who would make our world a cleaner and safer place to live, exploit his listeners’ racist tendencies, support Trump 100% no matter how many laws he breaks…Limbaugh’s legacy is undeniably toxic and has done massive damage to our political culture and discourse. He basically opened the door for self-serving monsters like Trump, which is unforgivable. (Naturally, Trump asked him to put off his cancer treatment so he could attend the SOTU address and receive a totally-unearned “medal of freedom” for some reason. Classic Trump, LOL.)
I told the staff today that I have a deeply personal relationship with God that I do not proselytize about. But I do, and I have been working that relationship tremendously, which I do regularly anyway, but I’ve been focused on it intensely for the past couple of weeks.
Well, now. The man dedicates his life to spreading hate, lies, and division, then figures he’ll assure his spot in Heaven by gettin’ good with God at the end. Why is he doing that, if he felt in his heart he was doing righteous work all his life? People like him always think they’re doing righteous, godly work. Could it be that he’s got some regrets? Might there be some doubt about his “guaranteed” arrival in Heaven? If God exists, he/she/it isn’t going to overlook the damage you’ve done, so prepare for your life review at His feet, Rush. It’s gonna be pretty cringey.
So yeah, I’m not feeling one tiny shred of sympathy for this cancer-riddled old crank. Unlike most Americans, he’ll have the best treatment money can buy and he’ll likely die in absolute comfort with an endless supply of happy pills (something he’s already quite familiar with). I predict he’ll get a hero’s burial, broadcast live on Fox News, while famous right-wingers fling their weeping bodies over his coffin and mourn the loss of such a valiant soul. On social media there will be weeks of public weeping, gnashing of teeth, rending of garments, and all that other dramatic shit. And then, finally, he will be gone.
In fact, the public teeth-gnashing has already begun on social media. I can barely bring myself to read any of it. Right-wingers on Facebook and Twitter are oh so appalled that some might be glad to be rid of him, even cheering for his death, and their fairweather outrage is pretty comical considering their absolute lack of compassion in so many other ways. Kids torn from their parents’ arms and babies dying in Trump’s border camps? Those brown people deserve it! But this right-wing radio guy gets cancer and HOW DARE YOU NOT WEEP?? Let’s see what happens when Obama falls ill or dies — these “compassionate conservatives” will be dancing in the streets, I guarantee it.
So let them mourn their precious radio guy. As for the rest of us, we’ll be fine. We won’t shed a single fucking tear.