Let Michael Phelps smoke his bong, goddammit

The sports world was shaken to its very core as Michael Phelps, darling swimmer of the 2008 Olympics, admitted that he did smoke pot from a bong as depicted in a tabloid photo.

“I’m 23 years old, and despite the successes I have had in the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner that people have come to expect from me,” Phelps said.  “For this, I am sorry.  I promise my fans and the public — it will not happen again.”

Once again the moronic idea that pot is somehow more dangerous than alcohol rears its stupid head.  This is pot we’re talking about, people…it’s nothing to get worked up about.  Shit, you’d think these people had caught him doing crystal meth or heroin!  This apology was complete nonsense, meant only to keep his sponsors
from pulling out and to get the high-and-mighty (drug-abusing,
alcohol-swilling, wife-beating) sports world off his back.

You know what, Mike?  Fuck these people…stop apologizing and smoke all you want.  You own your body, not the state or your manager or the alleged millions who look up to you as their ultimate sports hero of all time.  You control what happens to it and what goes into it, and you obviously know how to take care of it because you swim like a goddamn dolphin.  If it doesn’t affect your performance, go ahead and puff up once in a while.  You’ve earned it.  Just watch out for people carrying cameras next time, mmmkay?  Mmmkay.

And this hero-worship notion that his bong hits are going to somehow destroy the hopes and dreams of millions of kids is asinine.  This is what guys in their early 20’s do, for fuck’s sake!  Cut him some slack.  Hell, I’d be smoking too if I was under that kind of public microscope.

0 thoughts on “Let Michael Phelps smoke his bong, goddammit

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  1. I wonder if mary jane makes you swim faster…puff puff…pass the [performance enhancing] good stuff.
    The fact that the media made a big deal of this is mind numbingly stupid-
    Thank you for the “TV Sucks” page, i was passing by the tv my mom watches and i nearly lost it,
    “Commercial – Sometimes doctors are human like the rest of us……” makes me feel like throwing both my shoes at the tv

    Like

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