Pillow talk

Today I was looking at Target.com to see what kind of pillows they have.  I’m looking for something made for obnoxious snorers like myself, so I typed “snore pillow” into the search box and it turned up completely unrelated things like storage boxes and toys.  WTF?  Then I just put in “pillow” and it spewed out 3600+ results.  Geez, what a difference a word makes!

A couple of things on the first page of search results made me do a double-take.  First up is the Disney Hannah Montana Pillow.  Wouldn’t you just love to wake up drooling all over that mass-marketed face?  Here’s a customer review:  “I just received this in the mail and it is too cute!  It has little rhinestones and the back is lavender faux ‘hair’ if you will.  I can’t wait to give it to my daughter for her upcoming b-day!”  Like OMG I can’t wait either! 

That would look so totally awesome on that Hannah Montana Twin Comforter you got her last year!  Just be careful…you don’t wait little Brandi/Caitlyn/Trinity/Brianna to shread her purty lil’ face on those rhinestones.  Could scar her for life…or worse, cost her the Miss Trailer Park Teen award.

The next thing I saw is a fairly normal product, but the name made me stifle a guffaw here at the office:  the My Brest Friend Nursing Pillow.  You read correctly:  Brest.  And isn’t it also kind of unappetizing when they describe the color as “oatmeal”?  I suppose “tan” isn’t exotic enough for today’s shoppers.

0 thoughts on “Pillow talk

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  1. Just when you couldn’t imagine anything better there’s something that will whet your Hannah craving. Get a load of this pillow. We were selling this at my store for Valentine’s day and I had HAD to rub it on my crotch. That’s HOT!
    http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=8031762
    Here’s the description (don’t forget to click on the picture for a full view):
    >>>>
    Just zip and lock this soft, puffy diary and keep the paparazzi away! Dish about all of your favorite things on the custom My Favorite Things list. Change your mind? Just rip out the page, wash and start all over again. There’s even a weekly social event calendar for you to fill out and maintain. Coolest of all, there’s a built-in speaker for connecting your MP3 player, so you can rock out while you write!
    <<<<
    NOT making that up. If only Princess Diana had this pillow she would still be with us today!

    Like

  2. I don’t know about a pillow to stop snoring… but I have a couple of friends who swear by the “breath right” nasal strips. You’ll look like an idiot… but it may be worth a try.

    Like

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