The Dark Ages are alive and well in Rhea County, Tennessee. These people actually want to ban homosexuals from living there. “We need to keep them out of here,” says one official. Actually, I have a better idea. Let’s just build a nice big wall around your little shithole county so you’ll be free to live isolated and ignorant. You can keep inbreeding and producing hateful, ignorant little spawn who will grow up to be hateful, ignorant adults. We’ll call it the Zoo for Morons and charge people admission to come watch you in all your evil, hate-filled glory. Sound like a plan?
Oh, I just love it when companies like Coca-Cola are immensely embarrassed. Not only is their Dasani water not “mountain spring water” (it’s common filtered tapwater), but their process of adding “essential minerals” actually adds some toxic, cancer-causing elements. Isn’t that rich? I’m extremely entertained watching them squirm their way through this one, oohhhhh yes!
This highly amusing article appeared on Salon.com… Apparently Starbucks thinks that some people out there need special help with ordering a drink, so they’re spelling it all out in a special instruction manual. I must confess that the first time I stepped into a Starbucks on my first day as a Seattle resident, I took one look at the menu and froze like a deer in headlights. With several people waiting in line behind me, I thought to myself, fuck it…I’m getting a chai tea. I’ll deal with the coffee thing later. But eventually I dove in and ordered a latte, and answered the questions when they came up (What size? Milk or soy? Any flavor?). It really wasn’t so bad. Does it require an instruction manual? I don’t think so, but maybe Starbucks feels that they’re losing some potential customers who are too terrified to order anything. I’d love to see this book… I’ve noticed that their menus have changed as well, they’re arranged into a step-by-step process, which is actually kind of helpful.
Oh, that Bush…he’s such a kidder! Joking about WMDs during a media dinner, pretending to look around his office and not finding them. Now, that’s funny! It’s even funnier when you consider the hundreds of U.S. troops who have been killed because of his bullshit reasons for going to war. Yeah, that’s a RIOT!
Wow, this study says that bad eating habits are eventually going to overtake tobacco as a leading cause of death in our country. I absolutely believe it. Like the article says, we’re eating ourselves to death, and people don’t seem to mind. Here, little Bobby, have another hamburger…
Isn’t this hysterical? Some tickets for Mel Gibson’s bloodbath film “The Passion of the Christ” had the number 666 printed on them. How can you not enjoy such a delicious coincidence??
All these viruses which are causing so much havoc in our email systems are the product of whiny little programmers with a preschool mentality and penis-size issues, as this story shows us. They’re trying to outdo each other with all this virtual posturing…it’s just pathetic, and we’re the ones who suffer for it.
Masonic rituals are known for their violent, sadomasochistic nature, and this time some poor sap paid the ultimate price for it. Would you let a 76-year-old fart wearing a fez point a gun at you?
George Carlin had a few things to say about Nipplegate. He said much more to Salon.com which was more interesting, but it’s always good to hear from him about silly current events.
Wow, some people in Paris are really becoming a thorn in marketers’ sides. They’re vandalizing advertisements in the subways…even little old ladies are getting in on the action. I envy that…if I had the balls (and the time), I’d go around doing stuff like this too.
This is absolutely outrageous: our own Defense Secretary actually kept a piece of 9/11 wreckage as a souvenir! Jesus! Why isn’t this man being charged with removal of evidence from a crime scene or something? Oh, wait…his crowd is above the law. I almost forgot. I’m sure the families of those killed in the attacks will understand.
Wow, this is absolutely fascinating: a journalist actually confessing that he and his media brethren are guilty of handling the Iraq War coverage like amateurs by swallowing whatever the government told them and not checking facts or asking difficult questions. They misled the public, manipulated their emotions with sensationalism, and took whatever Bush’s gang said as the gospel truth. Too bad he’s pretty far down on the journalistic ladder…you’ll never hear one of the big network hotshots saying anything like this. Nope, too much truth involved.
What? Fructose is linked to obesity? You don’t say! Yeah, no shit. When you see “high fructose corn syrup” as one of the first three ingredients in something you’re about to eat, just remember that you’re eating something drenched in pure sugar. From lips to the hips, baby…that’s what it boils down to. And this is what people feed their kids on a daily basis. The scum who market this junk to kids aren’t innocent, either…they are a major part of the problem and they need to take some responsibility. But as long as people keep buying this crap and eating it, nothing will change.
This is just wonderful: Bush’s website allows people to generate their own campaign posters, but some people were having a bit of naughty fun with it and making some posters that no Busy supporter would be caught dead with. Of course, they fixed the problem so that you can only generate pre-approved messages, but I managed to download one of them and change the message to whatever I want… You can get them here. 🙂