College Football Games Spark Riots
Yes, rioting. Because they won. Rioting. You know what would be fun? Swinging a wrecking ball right through the middle of these “happy” winners who are trashing the shit out of everything. Yeah, plow a swath right through ’em, sending dozens of surprised rioters hurtling through the air and into the sides of nearby buildings. (Oh my, did I just type that? Must be my Inner George Carlin talking.)
Group challenges Miss America’s views
Let me get this straight (so to speak). This gay-advocacy group is claiming that abstinence is “extreme and dangerous”, and “puts youth in harm’s way.” Hmmm. Now, how do you figure that? Last I checked, blood transfusions notwithstanding, it’s extremely difficult to become infected with HIV when you don’t have sex. I can sort of see the point they’re trying to make: gays & lesbians can’t legally marry, so how can they practice “abstinence until marriage”? Well, how about “abstinence until monogamy”? Is that so different? If we can’t marry, we commit to each other in other ways. It doesn’t mean that gays & lesbians have no option outside of marriage to stop sleeping around. It’s called responsibility. I don’t see anything in this story advocating THAT. All I see is some “gay advocacy” group hysterically playing the victim card yet again, hoping to get some attention (and donations). I also see them attacking this idea because conservatives support it, albeit for different reasons (moral as opposed to health). Get a grip, people, and stop claiming to speak for all us homos. You’re almost as bad as those NGLTF folks.
Porn shows up in businessman’s slide show
Oh, this is hysterical. Not the pictures themselves, but the fact that he managed to mix them up with his presentation materials. Can you imagine? “Gee, how did THOSE get in there? My goodness!”
Artists leave blood and vomit-covered dolls in the streets
So this is modern art in action, eh? Sounds like a bad frat prank. “Hey, let’s do something really deep and artistic and stuff! Let’s create some lifelike effigies and cover them with fake blood and puke and stuff, then leave ’em out in the street to see what happens! If anyone complains, we can always tell them to shut up because it’s art and art is subjective, right?” Morons. Their intent was to “study people’s interaction with the dolls” in a forum. AS IF they didn’t know how people would react. What’s to discuss about such a predictable reaction? One local artist summed it up beautifully: “They go to college to come up with stupid things like that?”
ABC Seeks Sexiest Person in America
o.my.god. Network television is about to sink even lower into the depths of pathetic trolling for ratings. Can you imagine? A show actually called “Are You Hot?”, aimed at finding the “sexiest person in America”? Yes, some asshole network executive got his wish…six episodes are already in the works. And in the end, they will put the finalist up on your screen and tell you that THIS is hot. Not you. Him…or her. Whatever. The ABC reality chief (whatever the hell THAT is) said this show “will capitalize on the nation’s obsession with rating the looks and fashions of celebs and other public figures.” How original. But the networks sure know how to keep their audiences in their place. They keep holding up these bachelors, sudden-fame idols, millionaire trailer trash cows, empty-headed boybands, and zombie British rockstars as the ones who are somehow special because they’re on T.V. It’s all bullshit, like most of the stuff on T.V. My advice? Don’t watch. I know that a lot of you will, so if you must watch, at least refrain from buying any of the products advertised during the show. Do SOMEthing.
50 dead in riots over beauty pagent article
This is old news by now, but I was just amazed at this. This is a perfect example of taking one’s religion to its absolute extreme…rioting and killing rampaging all because of what someone wrote in a newspaper? Get a grip! I don’t care what religion you belong to…this is just plain idiotic. (And yes, the AP did misspell “pageant”.)
Fatal crashes caused by cell phone use rising
More fodder for the “no shit!” file. I frequently see people blabbing away on their cell phones while trying to drive, and more often than not, they’re not paying enough attention to the giant killing machine they’re supposedly in control of. I’ve seen people swerve halfway into the lane next to them, then jerk the wheel hard to swerve back into their own lane. Amazingly, I haven’t witnessed an accident caused by one of these dorks, and I hope I never do. But it happens all the time, and they’re putting us all in danger. And what about those cell phone yakkers who drive SUVs? I don’t even want to think about that.
The coming SUV wars
Oh, this is getting interesting. Read about the growing resistance to the SUV, and the forthcoming T.V. commercial linking SUVs to international terrorism. Brilliant! A friend of my roommate’s printed up some great bumper-stickers: “Fuel terrorism – Buy an SUV.” Think about it.
Minister sees devil in ‘Harry Potter’
These nutballs come out of the woodwork every time a high-profile movie involving something they consider “evil” hits the spotlight. They attempt to ride its coattails, desperately trying to attach their message to its fame. And it always comes across as pathetic and shallow, because it’s painfully obvious to everyone else that these people see evil in everything, and that’s a sad way to go through life. Their attitude can be summed up by two quotes from this story:
- Pastor: “Controversy! I love it, and I’m on the cutting edge of it. Amen!” Opportunist.
- Pastor’s wife: “If you do not have the spirit of God in you, you have the spirit of the devil in you.” Zealot.
Qwest to pay state $1.3M, consumers $250K
Well, now. Looks like Qwest is finally having to pay back some of its customers (and the state) for its unforgivably shitty service. I have had many problems with this company myself:
- I have had line filter hardware sent to me when I requested modem software.
- I have had to call a technician to the house FIVE different times over the past year to fix the same problem, which they can’t seem to figure out how to fix for good.
- My phone number has been sold to telemarketers against my wishes (and after their own marketing materials LIED by telling me my personal information was being kept private).
- I have waded through their mindless, infinitely-layered voicemail system in an attempt to reach an actual human being.
- I have had to repeat my phone number several times during a service call, since none of their computers manage to talk to each other.
- I have waited unreasonable amounts of time for customer service reps to talk to me, while listening to the endlessly annoying “Please wait, your business is valuable to us!” recording over and over and over and over again.
- I have been transferred to FOUR different departments within the same call, often returning, full circle, to the same department I started from.
- I have been disconnected during said transfers.
- I have had various billing errors and screw-ups on their part.
All of this has led myself and many others to believe that Qwest is one of the most incompetent (and incompetently-managed) companies this side of the Mississippi. Even their technicians talked about this company’s questionable business practices during their many visits to my house. And now they’re gonna pay a little. Good. Let’s hope for more of the same, if we continue to get more of the same quality of service.
Junk Food Giant McDonald’s To Close 175 Restaurants
Oh, I can’t tell you how much this makes my day. That’s 175 fewer outlets of highly-processed shitfood for them to peddle. However, it’s a small number compared to the total number of restaurants they have open worldwide (around 30,000), but hey, it’s a great start. Maybe people have been reading Fast Food Nation and taking it to heart, do ya think?
Kentucky gay group protested again
So there was another protest at that school in Kentucky, rallying against the Gay-Straight Alliance club. And gee, who could possibly have organized this protest of 2,000 people? Who would have the means and misguided convictions to get so many people to gather in the name of unfairness, intolerance, and restriction of freedom? Why, the church of course. Duh. Who else but the church would be stirring up peoples’ hatred and desire to control others they don’t like? Thank you, Rev. Tim York, for ignoring the issues in your community which are actually relevant and pursuing this shallow and childish cause in the name of a God who loves everyone equally…whether you do or not. Satan would be proud.
You Are a Suspect
Oh boy. If you think your privacy is being chipped away now, just wait until the Homeland Security boys get their evil, nosy tentacles into every aspect of your daily life. Your entire life will be watched, catalogued, tracked, and summarized in a nice, convenient file for them to peek into whenever they think they need to. Sleep well.
7 athletes arrested
Hooray for the exciting and challenging world of sports, which teaches our young people the value of competition, teamwork, and achievement against the odds. Three cheers to you!
No criminal charges in fatal I-405 crash
Driver who killed family of four was not reckless, prosecutors say
So this woman was driving her Ford Explorer, talking on her cell phone, and speeding. Recipe for disaster, right? And after she wiped out an entire family while distractedly driving her giant machine at unsafe speeds, they decide that she didn’t do anything “reckless”. The King County Prosecutor spokesman says, “…there was no evidence of alcohol or drugs or any evidence of recklessness or disregard for the safety of others. She made no sudden move. There was nothing extreme, no aggression.” I’m sorry, but you don’t NEED to be on drugs or make sudden moves or be aggressive to kill people with your car. A lot of times, all it takes is being distracted, which she clearly was. And driving an SUV at high speeds makes it a triple threat to all those around her. But after killing four people, she might get off with only a $250 fine. Small price for four lives terminated by such recklessness. Then again, maybe it’s really not her fault. Maybe we should hold the dead responsible choosing that spot on I-405 to stall their car. Yeah! Stupid people.
Security Showdown Could Impact Future
So the 35-age Homeland Security Bill has suddenly ballooned to 484 pages after the Republicans loaded it up with extra crap which they claim is going to help us Win the War on Terror™. For example, it contains “language to protect pharmaceutical companies from lawsuits over the vaccines they create and their side effects, including wiping out lawsuits already in court.” Wow! I feel safer already. Thank God for opportunistic politicians and their sniveling lobbyists.
Celine Sings for Chrysler
A 3-year deal? Artistic integrity? One word: WHORE.
Democrats need an injection of charisma
Oh Lordy, tell me about it. These people are in dire need of some leadership which doesn’t make me want to slip into a coma. This is a excellent, well-written piece on this topic.
Teen Burns Himself Copying ‘Jackass’ Stunt
Jackass? Try DUMBASS. And he’s right here in Washington, how lovely. Time to examine what’s in Bellevue’s water, eh? Or do ya sometimes think that maybe this is Nature’s way of removing some of the dull tools from the shed?
Michael Jackson Testifies in Calif. Trial
The horror! Michael Jackson testifies in California about canceled shows or something. But who really cares about the actual trial? You’ve seen the photo by now…look at it again! This…thing is no longer human. He’s completely artificial. A construct. A wax doll. A horrifying and tragic example of fame, wealth, and obsessive plastic surgery gone awry. His testimony is, as expected, quite amusing in itself. Read for yourself, if you dare……
Pentagon prepares psychological warfare campaign for Iraq
Here come the mind-games aimed at Iraqi people. Basically it’s a watered-down version of the propaganda they aim at the American public, but it has proven effective nonetheless. Fascinating, isn’t it?
Scouts kick out avowed atheist; Kitsap County case drew nationwide attention
Let me get this straight: the Boy Scouts are all about helping others and doing good things for the community, as long as you have the same religious beliefs as they do? So good deeds and excellent citizenship aren’t enough…all those great things you do for others as a Boy Scout suddenly become worthless once they find out you have your own opinions about God. If that is the case, then I say it’s a worthless organization which shouldn’t be taken seriously again, ever. Being a model citizen should NOT be conditional to something as private and personal as your religious leanings (if any).
Military dismisses seven gay linguists
Typical military rationale. “We’re not mature (or secure) enough to treat homosexuals like human beings, so we’re gonna kick these homo heathen linguists outta our ranks so we can go back to killing people and breaking stuff. Nevermind the massive linguist shortage we’re experiencing…we just want those homos out.” Oh, grow up. Are they still able to kick out people based on their race? Then why are they still allowed to kick them out based on sexual orientation? It’s the same damn thing. If someone can do his job well in the military, then he ought to be able to do it regardless of where his sexual compass points. Like race, this is something we’re born with, so you asshole military people ought to rethink your priorities sometime.
China’s Cyberwall Nearly Concrete
This is quite a startling story…. China’s internet censorship is so strong that they are very close to completely sealing off their Net from outside influence altogether. People are serving time in jail for surfing “forbidden” sites and sending emails to “forbidden” addresses. And guess what? U.S. companies are selling them the firewall technology to do it. Imagine…..
O’DONNELL LASHED OUT AT CANCER VICTIM: VF
What? Rosie’s not the Queen of Nice after all?? Shocking! Yeah, about as shocking as finding out she’s a lesbian. It’s been obvious to me for years that she’s an ironclad bitch…just watch her. It’s in her speech, it’s in her mannerisms, it’s everywhere. It’s totally obvious that this woman might be smiley and bubbly on the outside, but inside she’s waiting to snap someone’s head off. Martha Stewart is the same way: anyone that sickeningly sweet and wholesome has got to repressing something.
– Gay-rights decision protested at E. Kentucky school
– Allowing group to meet sparks student boycott
In other stupid gay-related news, here we have a high school whose dumbass students are boycotting school because (so they say) a Gay-Straight Alliance club was allowed to meet on school grounds. Never mind the fact that other non-school-related clubs are meeting on school grounds as well…these people won’t listen to logic. As someone in this story says, “Can you imagine being a gay or lesbian student in a community where people feel so free in expressing their intolerance? That must be a difficult place to be.” And, of course, the nitwit parents are backing them up. Thanks, parents, for teaching your kids that some students are less equal than others, and that it’s OK to skip school for any ol’ reason they wish.
Can the Web Be Believed? Not Always, Study Finds
Yet another story for the “No shit!” file. Gee, you mean I can’t quite trust everything I read on the Internet? Wow! The thought never occurred to me. I just assumed that it was allllll true, because who would ever post inaccurate information on the Web? Golly!