Dyslexia More Common in Boys
I refues to believe that thsi is true. It’s a compeltely baised opinoin and I resnet it…boys do NOT trasnpose letters more otfen than girls!!
Cross-shaped turnip ‘sign from God’
Wow, that turnip would sure make my salad heavenly! But I shouldn’t poke fun at things like this…not after my alphabet soup spelled out the entire text of the Bible the other day…in Latin.
Students Allegedly Plotted to Kill
What does it take to convince some parents that their kids are capable of murder? These people are in total denial mode: “Not MY child! He’s a good kid! MY son is angelic! He would NEVER plot to kill anyone!” They’re always quick to say “he’s a good kid”, but what if you find Satanic masks, a meat cleaver, an axe, and a photograph of Adolph Hitler in his room, like they did in this case? And their plans to use explosives? Not to mention the letter which details their entire plot, from start to finish. No, it’s still not enough evidence to convince her that her son is disturbed. Someone slap this woman before I do.
Are Coke and Harry Potter an Unhealthy Alliance?
Does this question really need to be asked? Anything sponsored by Coke is an unhealthy alliance. The same goes with McDonald’s…it’s crap food, and it has no place in the Harry Potter universe which is looked upon with reverence by so many kids. But money talks… and like the cigarette companies, these guys know a good market when they see one.
Burger King, AOL in Promotional Venture
Ahhh…. Junk Food and Junk Mail coming together for the first time. Such a glorious thing! The best part is that you can use those AOL discs as classy coasters for your Burger King drinks.
Carpet bombing ‘kills 150 civilians’ in frontline town
Just another day in the American War on Everything… Our Nintendo Warriors should have better aim than that. But they usually blame it on the smart missiles these days. “Bad smart missile! Bad!!” But then again, it’s only 150 people…collateral damage. No big deal.
Devout couple accused of flogging daughter to death
No doubt acting in full accord with the teachings of that Bible they hold so dear, I’m sure. Still, it’s curious that the story would even mention their religion, since people of all faiths are fully capable of such barbaric acts.
Jimi Hendrix Childhood Home Saved
You know, our economy is being flushed down the toilet at this very moment…and someone out there actually thinks that Jimi Hendrix’s childhood house has some sort of redeeming value to society. It’s a building, folks…not a holy relic. They aren’t even 100% sure that it’s his house…they see some purple trim and a photo of him in one window, and suddenly they’re on a crusade. I’m ready to call the Lost & Found Department and see if our sense of priorities has turned up yet.
Gay youth billboards jolt Southern city
Oh no! You mean gay teenagers are going public? Shocking! Revolting! Why, before you know it, they’ll be telling us that gay teens feel love and pain and rejection like normal people. We gotta put a stop to this kind of information! You just wait till the ladies at church hear about this!!
Lollipopman uses hairdryer as ‘radar gun’
I think I love this man. What a brilliant idea! Arrogant drivers who speed through slow zones deserve to be fooled this way…what fun!
Father kills boy for not counting to 100
This is astounding. It wasn’t the kid’s fault that his teacher didn’t teach them to count past 20! Gawd. People can sink to such incredible depths…
School suspends boy for wearing vagina Halloween costume
This is one of those “What were you thinking???” stories. And his mother thought it would be “educational” to his classmates…oh my. What color is the sky on her planet?
Christian theme park wants tax-exempt status
They’re joking, right? Right? Please tell me they are. And I’m not surprised one bit to learn that Pat Robertson’s group is representing these dorks. A theme park is a theme park, regardless of the theme. It’s a business, just like the church. It’s funny how the church wants to poke its nose into all sorts of political affairs, but it tries to avoid being taxed like the rest of us. You can’t have it both ways, folks. Hell, we could wipe out the entire national debt just by taxing the Catholic church on its real estate holdings.
Surrogate Boyfriends Rescue Men From Shopping
At first I thought, “How can a guy let his girlfriend go shopping with a total stranger?” Then I answered myself: “Well, it’s obvious they’re hiring gay men for this job. No worries.” I still think the idea is kinda silly, but oh well.
Man sets himself on fire at CherryVale Mall / Man sets self on fire in Illinois mall
Fabulous! This is Mall Madness at its best…and on the busiest shopping day of the year, no less! A man setting himself on fire and hurling flaming objects at shoppers while ranting incoherently about freedom and liberty…it’s perfect.
South Africans Laugh at ‘Survivors’
It ain’t the first time they’ve laughed at Americans, I’ll bet!
Vicar Bans Yoga Class From Church Hall
More silly ignorance from the church folks. Yoga is NOT a religion. Just as the guy in this story says, “It involves posture work, breathing techniques, what you eat and how you react to people.” Scary stuff, all right! Could lead many devoted Catholics to flee their guilt-ridden faith and suddenly start twisting themselves into pretzels!